Sad and Funny
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One day two cannibals were eating a clown when mid-bite one asked the other, “Does this taste funny to you?”
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The Norwegian lifeguard to his employer:
- There are unusually many nice bathers here today.
“How,” asked the boss " - At least seven people have waved to me.
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If it’s true that the size of a man’s feet indicates the size of his manhood, how come you never see clowns in porn?
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I phoned my wife last night and asked her if she wanted me to pick up fish and chips on my way home.
I thinks she still regrets letting me name the twins !!
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I only do what the voices in my wife’s head say to do.
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A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses.
She started her class by saying, “Everyone who thinks they’re stupid, stand up!”
After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up.
The teacher said, “Do you think you’re stupid, Little Johnny?”
“No, ma’am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!”
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Ahaha, ahaha 
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Husband and wife went to court for a divorce.
Judge: You have 3 kids. How will you divide them?
They had a long discussion and returned.
Ok sir, We will come back next year with 1 more.
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Guy goes to a phycologist, doctor draws two circles and says “What do you see?” the guy says “Sex.” So the doctor draws trees, “What do you see?” the guy says “sex”. The doctor draws a car, owl, “Sex, sex, sex”. The doctor says to him “You are obsessed with sex”, he replies “Well you’re the one drawing all the dirty pictures!” 
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That joke made me think of sex.
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Mission accomplished 
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When I airbrush I practice painting lots of circles big and little, since there are so many designs that incorporate them. So I guess I think about sex artistically speaking, so to say. That should let me off the hook.
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Ahaha, ahaha yes indeed !!
I was in a bar the other night and a woman got her nipple pierced right there in the bar. I really suck at darts.
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Did you know that the Flat Earth Society has members all over the globe.
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There was a preacher who fell in the ocean and he couldn’t swim.
When a boat came by, the captain yelled, “Do you need help, sir?”
The preacher calmly said “No, God will save me.”
A little later, another boat came by and a fisherman asked, “Hey, do you need help?”
The preacher replied again, “No God will save me.”
Eventually the preacher drowned and went to heaven.
The preacher asked God, “Why didn’t you save me?”
God replied, “Fool, I sent you two boats!”
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