My father was a simple man, my mother was a simple woman. Together they produced a simpleton 
6 Likes
A friend of mine said to put horse manure on my strawberries. I won’t try that again. I am going back to whip cream.
6 Likes
Why did the old woman fall in the well?
The old woman didn’t see well.
7 Likes
I tried it. Tasted like sh!t.
3 Likes
I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.
8 Likes
What did the snail who was riding on the turtle’s back say? Wheeeee!
5 Likes
I am familiar with that diet!
4 Likes
Not awesome. lol
What do call a bunch of millionaires sitting around a TV watching the super bowl?
The Dallas Cowboys
4 Likes
lol:)good one!.
2 Likes
My wife told me to put on a clean pair of socks on every day.
By Friday I couldn’t put my shoes on.
7 Likes
That just made my day !
1 Like
Been there!
2 Likes
I find the backs of teeth are so much easier to clean if you can take them out.
7 Likes
This was moved from Thought of the Day.
It’s not funny.
2 Likes
Well, it’s the thought that counts, and I thought it was funny.
7 Likes