Carol…You just gave me a great idea! 
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Sue .Lol that is me! 
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Ermm, i wouldn’t try that kind of bubbly Bodie! 
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A genie tells a man, “I shall grant you 3 wishes.”
The man says, “I wish for a world without lawyers.”
The genie says, “Done. You have no more wishes.”
The man protests, “Wait! You said 3!”
The genie replies, "Oh yeah?
Sue me."
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A man got hit in the head with a can of Coke. Thank goodness it was a soft drink.
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Angry husband is not happy with his wife, so he sent a message to his mother - in- law. Your product does not match my requirements. Smart mother-in-law replies Warranty expired, manufactuer not responsible after seal is broken
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Wife said look at that drunk guy. I said who is he ? 10 years back he proposed to me and I rejected him. I said oh my God he is still celebrating
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A sheepdog brought the flock back to the farm and told the shepherd, “Here’s your 40 sheep.” The farmer said, “But I only have 36.”
The sheepdog replied, “I know, but I rounded them up.”
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Now that is FUNNY lmao:).
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Did you see the toddler who was wearing sunglasses and having a tantrum?
He was throwing shades.
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If you wear your Prom dress to the pharmacy’ they’ll fill your antidepressants faster.
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My girlfriend bought a cook book the other day called ‘cheap and easy vegetarian cooking’. Which is perfect for her because not only is she vegetarian…
Oh my, Swampy!!
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My wife and I had a fight today.
Then she came to me on hand and knees saying: come out from under that bed and fight like a man.
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