A female poker player who played every month with her female friends once got home at 2:00 a.m. after a game.
Determined not to disturb her husband, she undressed in the living room, tossed her purse over her shoulder, and walked barefoot into the bedroom.
She was shocked to see her husband awake and reading a book. “Gosh woman!” he yelled. “Did you lose everything?”
A telescope just turned up in our lost and found box.
We don’t know who it belongs to, but we’re looking into it.
Time for Ryan jokes @Craig_Anthony
Hahahahahaha, thank you. He’s going to crack up 
.
My girlfriend said I needed to get in touch with my feminine side; so, I brought up something she did five years ago that pissed me off.
A women is in the delivery room ready to give birth and the doctor looks at his staff and says she will not make it.
but the baby will & by law the baby has to be given a name right away.
so he sends his nurse into the waiting room to see what relatives are present, so her brother comes in and names the baby.
all of a sudden the women awakes & says what haappened.
the doctor says we thought you were not going to survive and by law your brother had to come in a name the baby, but you had twins a girl and a boy.
the woman says to the doctor my brother is an idiot what did he name them.
the doctor said he named the girl denise.
she says not bad, what did he name the boy.
the doctor said he named him the nephew…
Tourist walks into a Scottish pub and asks for a lager with a dash of lime, “sorry sir” answers the barman, “we don’t do cocktails”
If women are so good at multi-tasking, why cant they have a headache and sex at the same time?
Which one of King Arthur’s knights built the round table?
Sir Cumference.
Craig, lmao, good one:).
I worked with a young man who was engaged to a Hispanic girl and when my church sold tamales, he bought a dozen mild. Next
morning first thing he said was this.: I went home and microwaved all the tamales and had trouble eating them, No, amount of ketchup made them edible, they were so crunchy and hard to swallow. Then his mother told him he was supposed to take the corn husks off. LOL
Mrzick, my wife a blonde Spanish and we both read this joke 4 times but awww do not get it:).
I had some friends over for dinner, I thought I would make something different so I slow cooked an ox tongue.
One of the guests declined saying he could not eat something from an animals mouth, so I cooked him an omelette.
Hahahaha, an omelette
Well sorry about that, you have eaten tamales before, right? They are steam cooked in a cornhusk (leaves from like corn on the cob) You take the husks off before eating the ears of corn. My mistake was that I assumed he was aware of how to eat the tamales as he was dating her.
