Getting old means you understand when people give you sound advice, 99% is just sound.
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You’re only as old as who you feel.
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The ONE thing I’ve learned that will change everyone’s life is … dag nab it brb restroom AGAIN, Will have to enlighten later 
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Yup!!
We don’t offer senior discounts, you’ve had more time to save your money!
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The thing to remember, whatever age you are, is to pee whenever you get the opportunity.
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You speak for yourself, I’m still reminiscing about being 47!
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People are not as dumb as they look. Unfortunately, they are usually much much worse
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When people say you are “aging gracefully,” they really mean you are looking worse and worse, but a little more slowly than they expected.
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my idol, such great words of wisdom !!
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Sometimes I’m fast. Other times, I’m only half so.
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Trying is an attempt to fail. Just do it! Trying is an excuse.
I tried it, I really did, but I just couldn’t do it. Easier to say “I tried” than admitting not enough effort went into making it work.
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One irritating thing about being old is that there are more hairs growing outa my nose and ears than on my head.
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A very helpful thing I’ve learned from becoming old: If you make a promise you absolutely cannot keep, the task ahead is not to keep pretending you can keep it but instead to admit that it was, after all, a promise you never should have made in the first place.
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Wont You just shut up ?! 
“your Yes shall mean Yes, and your No shall mean No” from the Bible, Mathew 5.37
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“Do or do not. There is no try.” -Yoda
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That’s the first line from the Rolling Stones song Mother’s Little Helper.
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You know you’re getting old when you can take a power nap as you are filling out a form online and waiting for it to scroll backwards until it reaches your birth year.
That’s a mutant original!
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